


I Think?

by Hawkwitch



Series: oneshots [4]
Category: Yes Minister
Genre: Gen, Humor, Monologue
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-18
Updated: 2013-07-18
Packaged: 2017-12-20 15:00:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 502
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/888622
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hawkwitch/pseuds/Hawkwitch
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A missing scene from James Hacker's first workday in DAA, happens at around 7PM or so. This ficcie has no goal whatsoever, really. Rating: G.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Think?

The Prime Minister is so awesome I think! Is he? Isn't he? I think?  
Finally going home to my sweet Annie...  
Dang. I have lost my key for the little red boxes! Have I? Haven't I? Noooooo! Yes?  
I just thought I could go home after my first day as the Minister of Administrative Affairs, but now it turns out I need to go back to my office and find it. Stupidy stupidy stupidy stupidy stupid. Sigh...  
I want an ice-cream! Or an apple! Yes? No?  
I can hear voices... no, not those ones, silly, what I mean is my little bureaucrats are still in the office talking about their vacations or salaries or something.  
Met Sir Humphrey Appleby last year once, when he answered the questions of MP-s. His speech was so boring I nearly fell asleep. I can barely understand anything he is saying. But he's alright I think? Is he? Isn't he? I think?  
And that Principal Private Secretary Bernard Woolley with those obscure jokes and empty stare like nobody's home. But he's alright I think? Is he? Isn't he? I think?  
Should I go in? Should I? Should I not?  
It would be a little embarrassing actually? I'd look stupid? Yes? No?  
Listen behind the door perhaps? This dialogue is actually quite funny, come to think of it... Is it? Isn't it? I think?

„Berrrnnnarrrd, you caused me quite some embarrassment by asking such silly questions in front of Sir Arnold. Worthy of a complete rookie. I'm rather intrigued to ask you, Bernard: have you ever wondered what it feels like to THINK for yourself?"  
„My job is executing orders, not thinking for myself, Sir Humphrey."  
„Executing orders, you say, Bernard? Care to explain then, how Weasel escaped?"  
„We could not exactly lock him up."  
„Why not?"  
„Well, that would have been sort of cruel and unusual."  
„Well, at least you should not have made Lloyd responsible for keeping an eye on him. I bet this imbecile fell asleep."  
„I apologize, Sir Humphrey, none of it will happen again. But I think I have told you that I would like to see clear goals in doing this job..."  
„Oh my dear Bernard! Don't get insolent with me! We have been through this! „Goals" are for middle management! If you are serious about doing general management, then you ought to abandon this small box of middle management thinking."

Blah blah blah.  
Oh. This is just so pathetic. All these bureaucrat types care about are their own petty rivalries. Never think about moving themselves to do something that is good for the society. Or doing anything that is... well... simply FUN. Or actually... doing anything. Yes? No?  
James Hacker is here to lead the way to the Open Governement! I think?  
Why did I come here anyway?  
Dang. Now I remember, I gave the key to my political advisor Frank Weizel. Wonderful kid! Is he? Isn't he? I think?  
I go home then, I think. Yes? No? I think?

FIN.


End file.
